KITTY ACUPUNCTURE

So last night I fell asleep on my couch and was awakened by my girlfriend who had begged me to help her with somem trash that had piled up on her back patio. I had declined and she had left to take care of it by herself, however was soo grossed out by some unexpected larvae, that she couldn't handle it, and since my phone was set on silent in the other room, I had not heard her call me ten times. So she decided to come by and see why I wasn't answering. So she walkED in to find me asleep, woke me up and started telling me her dilemma. About 30 seconds into her plea for help, my cat Miako decided she needed N's attention, ran up her leg and attatched herself to N's chest via claws (normally I catch her and she doesn't need her claws)

*Now, the trick was cute when she was a kitten. She would spring up my pants and shirt and I would grab her , hold her, and pet her. These days the trick still works, only her vertical leap is high enough for me to catch her on her initial jump. The problem is that she tries the trick when I am not paying attention, the other problem is that she tries the trick with my guests and friends who don't see it coming.

The day before she got N, she got me while I was ..err...taking care of business. She jumped up and latched onto me back. It hurt. I tried to shake her off, which made her dig in even further. It hurt worse. I managed to grab the scruff of her neck and chuck her into the hallway, a little too hard. Anyhow, i had all of her claws equally dispersed in my back, which hurts, dont get me wrong...but it looked like she was hanging onto the center of N's chest by a single claw. Imagine the weight of a small adult cat suspended from one place... that place being a hook driven through the first 4 layers of your epidermis.
...Yeah, I bet it still hurts. Sorry hun!

The stealthy culprit

IIT'S FRIDAY

I find cellular phones to be quite extrodinary. I remember a time when we were tied to a wall with a curly cord that looked like a pigs tail. Our only phone was tied to the kitchen wall, and you could take it into the garage, because we had a long cord, but you couldn't go much further than right outside the door. Now I have a phone on me that I can take anywhere in the country and still get the calls. It makes me wonder how it all works. How do the calls know to come to my phone...id there a paging system that all other phones are constantly listening into for their number to be called...does a signal get sent to everyphone in my area that falls on deaf recievers except for my phone? Really, if you think about it, and if you don't know how it works, it seems quite perplexing...someone should look that up sometime, but not me, I'm going home. Have a nice weekend.

Rotary phone

CHEEZ BALLS

I don't think that it is wrong to eat ice cream as a meal. For roughly two weeks during my junior year of high school, I bought a double scoop from thrifty's as lunch, and never had any problems. It was also alot cheaper than buying the the bean burritos and small Mt. Dew that served as my lunch for the majority of my high school career. On campus burritos were pretty good too, deep fried, crunchy and slightly spicy, they also went well with a can of Mt. Dew. They also sold chocolate chip cookie dough, which was a splurge, but which I bought fairly often. One of my favorite things to eat was Planters cheez balls with a bottle of ginger ale. I referred to this as my "nectar and ambrosia" I could polish off a whole tin in one sitting. I liked the way the puffs dissolved in my mouth, and the flavor was excellent. They have since discontinued the cheez balls...last time I bought them they had added more zing to the cheez flavor...it was bad. I missed the buttery light cheesy flavor that they used to have.

I don't know why companies insist on taking a perfectly good product and changing the flavor just so they can add a "new" sticker on it. They did the same thing to "Chicken in a biscuit." They made them taste more ranchy, (raunchy). It must have failed because the new flavor was very not good, and the boxes are now marked original flavor...only I have had them and they are not the original flavor. Something has been changed, they are not the same buttery chickeny flavored crackers that I remember from my childhood, and that is just a shame.

I was going to end there but in doing a GIS for "planters cheese balls" I see images of "Planters Cheez Mania." These are the little monstrosities that they replaced the cheez balls with. (and I will end my sentences with prepositions if I care to.) I guess they are targeting dumb little kids now, because kids love stupid cartoon cheese wedges on skateboards, and don't have very discerning pallates. What happened to the sophisticated Mr. Peanut peddling his buttery flavored cheez balls? I hope people realize how nasty the replacements are and that they sit on the shelves and rot (only there are so many preservatives in cheez balls that they along with roaches and twinkies will survive nuclear holocaust), why not let the consumers choose? why not offer both original and extra nasty cheezy? KFC does it, and look at their success!

END

the nasty new turbo flavored cheez wedge surfing ona a wave fo cheez flavoring cheez balls (blech!)

the original classy packaging and tasty cheez balls

IT'S NOT THE BLACK HOLE

I posted this on a friend's blog, but then I did some research and figured it out...

So my mom was trying to tell me about this movie that she remembered was really good, the conversation went more or less like this, "There was this guy...And he lived alone on this space station and grew plants, and he had a robot, and I remember it was kind of sad"
"What did the robot look like"
"Umm..I don't know"
"And he grew plants?...Was he evil? was the robot evil? Was it the black hole?"
"No, it wasn't the 'black hole.' He had to grow plants for the Earth because they couldn't grow them anymore"
"There were plants in the 'BLACK HOLE'"
"It wasn't the black hole!"
"What did the robots look like?"
"umm...*laugh*...I don't know, all I can think of is like R2-D2. Like a mix between R2-D2 and the Black Hole robots"
"So what happens?"
"I don't want to tell you, I only remember the end and I don't want to give it away"
"You said it was sad...does the guy die?"
"I'm not telling you"
"Well you said it was sort of sad...you wouldn't be sad if the plants died"
"You don't know that"
"Mom, come one, the guy dies, what else do you remember"
"Well, you don't see him die, I just remember you see him laying on the ground and the camera pans back away from him and out of like this greenhouse thing and into space..."

"...That's all you remember?"
"Uh-huh"

"...So this movie is really good, but all you can remember is the last camera pan? And that there were plants and a robot."
"Yeah, it's good"
"Nice"

So anyhow, I did some research, using the keywords 'plants earth' on the IMDB, which, for those of you who don't know(mom), is the Internet Movie Data Base. The movie she was talking about is called Silent Running, and she has the general idea right, but is missing some of the more inportant events. Oh, and the robots look nothing like R-2 or vincent and bob from Black Hole. Anyhow, i put it in my netflix queue, Ill tell you how it is after I watch it, ciao

I don't see the resemblance. And actually, Duey would have come before both of the other two.

BICYCLE DIARIES

This one time, John and Brandon and myself were going to school, Jr. High, actually we returning to school from the doughnut shop, or maybe even going to school from the doughnut shop, I was riding Brandon's bicycle, it was low, like a BMX, he was riding my 18 speed, and John was riding his own bike. We were sort of racing, weaving in and out of each other's paths and cutting each other off as the norm was, I weaved to pass between a telephone pole and a fence and the next thing I knew my butt was on the ground, the bike was in the air in front of me. I sat for a second or two quite confused as the bike came down to earth in front of me, both Brandon and John saw that I was no longer on the bike and stopped to turn around, I looked up at them and noticed what had knocked me off the bike. Someone had nailed a piece of wood between the telephone pole and the fence where I had attmpted to pass. The handlebars on the bike were low enough to allow my hands to pass under, and the bar had caught me right across the shoulders and had done so with so little force that I did not feel it. The bike simly lept on going while the bar gently knocked me onto my @$$. If I had been riding my bike, my finger would have been crushed between the piece of wood and the handlebars, I felt very lucky.

Another time, we made John crash, he had borrowed someone'd Univega, and when he bit it, we saw the little Emblem pop up in the air, spinning, and then fly off into the grass somewhere. John was livid, he called us, Damien and I, all sorts of names, I felt bad, but I thought it was still pretty funny how he crashed.

The worst was when Brandon and I forced Damien to crash into a car or gutter, I dont know which he hit, but he had a pretty good cut on the side of his hand. I felt bad about that one too, and I didn't think there was anything particularly funny about it...I think that is when we stopped forcing each other off of the road.

My sister bought a new bike this one time...It was a decent bike, a 21 speed mountain bike, but it was heavier than my green and white Huffy, which was the second best bike I have ever owned...lasted me ten years, and I even sold it for 20 dollars at the end, anyhow K and I decided to go for a ride, to test out her new bike. We set out towards the country side, the farms that slowly becoming extinct around the neighborhood, riding at a leisurely pace. We had been riding for a good 15 minutes or so and I was looking out across the fields of grass or dirt, following behind my sister. Suddenlt some dust caught my eye...it was a trail of dust, and I was seeing the dissapating end. I casually followed the trail towards us to see what was making it, and then I saw it... a large, mean, farm dog barreling down on us at top speed. Without saying a word (aghyaaa, does not count as a word) I stood up and started pedaling for my life...in a second I was past my sister, in another i was two bike lengths ahead, and speeding up. She heard my grunt and saw me speed off, but didn't know why, she turned, and by this time the dog had covered some serious ground, and It was MUCH MUCH closer than when I had spotted it, she gasped in suprise, and then started pedaling like mad herself... I am fairly sure that she shouted my name, half pleading for me to wait, half mad at me for taking off without warning, at me as she came...we rode as fast as we could for half a mile...to the boundary of the farm I guess, until the dog peeled off and turned back home. We stopped and rested, and had a good laugh about it, though K was still upset that I had ditched her. I guess I think of self preservation first.

Early on in my life I had given up on riding a bike. I couldn't use the training wheels because K already knew how to ride a bike, and didn't want them on...I think it may have been her bike I was learning on, anyhow, most of my bike riding at that age consisted of my dad pushing me with enough force for me to cruise for several meters and then crash into the street. As I got better at the balance thing, they told me to look ahead in the street to where I was going...He pushed and I went, and I was doing really good, I had a spot where I was going picked out, and I was looking at it, it was about ten housed down the street. Unfortunately my steering wasn't that great and, though I managed to keep myself on the bike for the longest period on my prersonal record, I piloted the bicycle right into the mailbox. My parents said to me, as I lay in a twisted heap of little kid, bicycle, and mailbox, "We told you to look where you were going!"
I said,"*sob* I did!! *sob* I was looking there! *sob*" as I pointed to the house that I had picked out, away down the street. They thought that was pretty funny.

THE SIMS

It is Wednesday and I have been playing the sims way too much. The sims is a delightful little game where you can create simulated people and then build them a house, furnish it, and then get your sims jobs to make money to buy better stuff, or buy things that they can use to get better skills to get job promotions to make more money. It is a pretty big waste of time actually, but still fun none the less.
I started out with just the prefab sims, that is, (Michael Bachelor)(Mortimer, Bela, and Cassandra Goth) and(Betty and Bob Newbie). I ran through the tutorial, which involves moving Bob and Betty about, and soon moved on to Running Michael Bachelors life. I got him a job on the music track, and had him wine and dine Bela until she was in the mood to leave the Goth household and become a Bachelor herself (bachelor is thier last name, or rather, their house name. Michael soon was promoted into better jobs, but hit a ceiling when he needed more than 5 family friends for a new job. This led me to the creation of my first all new Sims, The Singles. Three ladies were dropped into the Singles house, Cokie, Mio, and Roxanne. Cokie was the classy one, she got a job with the psychic friends network and was on her way to tarot card reader in no time. Roxanne, the vamp of the neighborhood, began to work nights as a security guard, and Mio, the immigrant, started out in the mailroom on a business track. The singles house was a close cousin to a house I designed that was supposed to be incorporated into affordable track housing in farmersville, anyhow, the Singles advanced for some time until the next house was created. This was the Youngs-Vanrees household, and it housed three guys, Lucas, Ben, and Nick. They were loosely based on myself, my roommate, and my friend who set up a bed in my dining room for about a month. Jobs were selected based on our current jobs/fields. Lucas started out as a subway musician, Ben, a waiter, and Nick, a tour guide or something, (it was the extremem job field). The three of us, real life us, would gather around the computer and laugh about the similarities and differences our computer counterparts had with one another...also we designed their house to be a close replica of the one that we live in, so it was pretty funny. My roommate was addicted for a good week, he would stay up well into the night, trying to buy things that were more similar to what we had in the house.
For some reason or another, because I was bored with the Singles, and didn't want to screw up my roommates game with the YVR's, I invented the Van Jorgenson family. Sven and Denise were the parents, Ollie, Danielle and Daniel were the children, and uncle Bob was included just for some extra income. Now unfortunately, sims have no skills when they start out, this means that they constantly break stuff, but even worse, they start fires when they use the range. This happened to Sven when he was trying to cook dinner, luckily Denise was a quick thinker and hurried in with an extinguisher to put out the flame, unfortunately she was also a complete Tard and somehow lit herself on fire in the process. At this point I had not yet learned about fire alarms and burgalar alarms, so unfortunately, poor Denise burned to death. Her ashes were in the living room for some time, the family mourned for a few days, this got tiring so I moved her ashes into the yard, where they automatically turned into a gravestone, so that the family wouldn't constantly be reminded of her untimely agonizing death, well, they still wandered out back for a while to mourn, but I think I must have stapped them from mourning too early becasue Denise started haunting her family. She would literally scare the pee out of them, and that was a pain to clean up. I got tired of her haunting the place so I sold her Urn for ten bucks and she stopped coming around.
Sim children are mostly useless, just like real children. They watch TV, they can't cook for themselves, they leave messes all over the house, they can't take a shower without flooding the whole freakin bathroom, they don't bring in any income whatsoever, unless you count the 100 dollars their grandparents send them every once in a while for good grades, and they just get in the way generally. I was tempted to corral them in a fenced in area, or take off the door to their rooms while they were sleeping and let them starve to death. But then I relaized that the children are excellent to use for making friends. I can keep them up well into the night, since they don't have jobs that they have to be in a good mood for, I can send them off to school hungry and miserable, and it really won't affect the rest of the family. I mostly used the Jorgenson children for slave labor, that is, I make them clean up everything to save money on the maid, and for making frinds.
After I had moved the YVR family to better digs, and had both Betty and Bob movie in with the singles, I knocked over the Newbie house and built the Hawk House. Brian and elanor moved in with thier 20 something twin daughters Hallie and Holly along with Brians parents, Brians brother Hobart and his wife Gertha. Note the lack of children. This house was made to bring in the money, everyone, except for gandma and grandpa went to work, Grandma stayed home and did all the cooking, while grandpa stayed home to fix anything that got broke, and to make out with grandma, as well as to make friends with the neighbors. The thing about Grandpa is that he is kind of grumpy. Pretty much anytime grandma, or anyone else for that matter, initates converstaion with him, his reaction is negative, and he prefers to do stuff by himself...but he is quick about fixing stuff. The Hawk's brought in a lot of money quickly and were able to buy nicer things and soon amassed enough wealth to move into the big house on the hill. The jorgensons decided to move out of their house...since a glitch in the game was making the neighbors gather at the corner and pee themselves until they passed on..and moved into the old Hawk house. The roomies (another prefab family) moved into a rectangular shaped house and didn't progress much. and the singles continues to amass their wealth. Somehow Michael Bachelor got Hallie to move in with him and his wife, while the Goth family pretty made pretty much very little progress.

The Goth house.

Here is my post for Thursday June 9th 2005

WALNUT AVE

For a short period of time, my dad had ana apartment on Walunut ave. It was in a small two story complex where all of the units faced inwards towards a small grass courtyard. The complex was painted bright yellow. I remember there were other kids in the complex, but I don't remember their names. I had fun playing with them though. One day on of the kids put on a magic show for his/her family. I hid under the coffee table and no one knew I was underneath it. At the end of the "show" he/she commanded the table to levetate, and it did. I think the spectators were pretty shocked at first, but then after enough levetating I came out from underneath and everyone had a good laugh. I remember them being impressed at how long I was able to stay quiet under the coffee table.

I also remember that the place smelled sugary, and that my dad had kept sugar cones in one of the cupboards, and I was still small enough to have to climb up on top of the counter to get to them. No ice cream, just the cones, or maybe there was ice cream, but i couldnt get into the freezer for some reason, and it was most likely French Vanilla, which I did not care for. I must have over done it one time and it ruined it for many years after.

Is it a Wall or is it a NUT? No, it's a Wal-nut (copyright 1995 Wal-Mart Corporation of America)

EVANS

I lived at 936 W. Evans...sort of. The house, which has since been sold, belonged to my step-mother and so I lived there less than half the time. The house had a pool, which my friends and I used to enjoy all summer. My step-sister and her friends would often lay out, undoing their bikini straps while they subathed, while I and my friends played shark and minnow or marco polo, always watching them out of the corners of our eyes, always hoping to catch a glimpse of something, but which to my boyish dissapointment never quite materialized.

One or two times I arrived unnanouced at the place, during the summer, come to play computer games or wait for my friends to come over to swim, to find my step-mother (Sm) out back, topless, doing chores with her headset on, totally oblivious to me, well, the first time it happened we suprised each other, I don't know who was more embarrassed. The second time I managed to see her without her seeing me, so I just ducked back into the house and went to play games on my dad's computer with the music up pretty loud.

I remember when I was younger maybe 7 or eight, maybe ten, there was an incicent where somehow I got hold of my Sm's breast. After this event I was told that if I wanted to touch Sm's breast that I needed to ask first. Which I thought was strange, like I was going to go up to her and say " (L) can I fondle your breasts please?" It seems as ridiculous to me now as it did back then. What has always bothered me is that I know that I did not grope, grapple, or fondle her on purpose, I didn't even know that I had, if I did, which I must have, but even so, If I had, I think I would remember. Like the time T wouldn't let me go so as a last resort I reached out and gave her a good squeeze, which worked marvelously. Anyhow just for the record I never purposely touched Sm's breast, and I do not even remember accidentally doing so.

Anyhow, Evans always made me think of that guy on knight rider...No, not David Hasslehoff, the other guy.

Ok, so his name was Devon, but I remembered it being Evan, and so I associated it with Evans. and its my blog so nyeah! :)